Daily
Reflections reading March 23rd
And No More Reservations
We
have seen the truth again and again: “Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic.”.
. . If we are planning to stop drinking, there must be no reservation of any kind,
nor any lurking notion that someday we will be immune to alcohol. . . . To be
gravely affected, one does not necessarily have to drink a long time nor take
the quantities some of us have. This is particularly true of women. Potential
female alcoholics often turn into the real thing and are gone beyond recall in
a few years. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 33
These
words are underlined in my book. They are true for men and women alcoholics. On
many occasions I’ve turned to this page and reflected on this passage. I need
never fool myself by recalling my sometimes differing drinking patterns, or by
believing I am “cured.” I like to think that, if sobriety is God’s gift to me,
then my sober life is my gift to God. I hope that God is as happy with His gift
as I am with mine.
© Alcoholics Anonymous World Services
My
thoughts on March 23rd Reading
Relapse is unfortunately a part of recovery not a necessary
part but to a lot its a false start the only way anyone can relapse is by
bending the elbow and drinking again I only know for me I had to hit a very
hard bottom before I surrendered with out any reservations
I became willing to change my life I discarding everything
in my life like I died, I needed every fall I had to get me to where I am
today, every drink had its purpose and god was given me another chance at life,
all I needed to do is follow His path
Very hard not to get discouraged at times, not just in
recovery but in life itself, after all I am human I would like every thing to
run like clock works, but even a clock breaks down at times, so despair is very
much a part of my life, its what I do to avoid this despair that counts
Do I sit and sulk, or get drunk, or do I do the next right
thing, like talk things over with another friend I can seek other kinds of help
from professionals, I have found many times in my sober life things that were
very discouraging, I felt the hopelessness and despair slip back into my life
Fear, depression, anger, rage, and resentments, are all right
there on my shoulder, just waiting like the bottle, to take over my life again,
the big difference is that I have God at my side today, and by using God when
times get rough is a blessing, because I can turn to Him for help
I have in daily practice been turning to Him to help me stay
away from that first drink; these repetitive actions saved sanity and yes even
my life more than once in recovery,
My wife and I have many health problems today, we do get very
discouraged at times when God seems just out of reach, but thanks to AA I can
get back on track quickly today and God has never given me more than I could
handle in just one day
We have a son who has cirrhosis and is in and out hospitals
because of this disease, we just keep praying that he gets a liver transplant
in time to save his life, YET he tried to do it on his own one more time no
meetings no AA and no support
But this does keep me knowing I can have no reservations
about drinking again, if I did then I could be in the same position that our
son is in now, I surrendered with out any reservations about drinking again
thanks to God, the twelve steps and this fantastic fellowship
I knew after I read chapter five I could not ever drink in safety
again, rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path
telling our stories what we used to be like what happened and what we are like
now
I decided I wanted what AA had and I was willing to go to
any lengths to get it, with out any more reservations I surrendered completely
to the program I needed to get humble and honest surrender to everything with
out reservation
I must do my part reaching out to make it possible for
others to recover, always remembering others have a right not to recover if
they chose not to, God works thru people stay with the basics and AA will carry
on for us all
God bless you Al M
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