Daily
Reflections reading April 24th
Learning To Love Ourselves
Alcoholism
was a lonely business, even though we were surrounded by people who loved us…
We were trying to find emotional security either by dominating or by being dependent
upon others . . . We still vainly tried to be secure by some unhealthy sort of
domination or dependence. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 252
When
I did my personal inventory I found that I had unhealthy relationships with
most people in my life-my friends and family, for example. I always felt
isolated and lonely. I drank to dull emotional pain. It was through staying
sober, having a good sponsor and working the Twelve Steps that I was able to
build up my low self-esteem. First the Twelve Steps taught me to become my own
best friend, and then, when I was able to love myself, I could reach out and
love others.
© Alcoholics Anonymous World Services
My thoughts on April 24th Reading
It did not take long to realize the
people who were at these meetings had be were I was, a lot of what I was
hearing was good stuff about how to stay sober how to change, how to learn how
to love myself after all I could not give any real love back if I could not
even love myself
My self-centeredness of being God had to
change, my free will was getting in the way of my ever having peace or love in
my life, I did have to find the willingness to surrender and accept I was
powerless over alcohol and my life was unmanageable
Today one of my favorite saying is
acceptance is the key to all my problems today, I don’t always like what’s put
in front of me, or what I have put in front of myself, but the things that come
my way are here for a reason only God knows about
I do the best I can to accept it as it
is, knowing He has never give me more than I could handle I have to look to my
new found God, of my understanding, for guidance and strength, its His will for
me I am trying to seek He showed my what true love is
I know He gave my strength to let go of
my old ways, He removed the desire to drink from me he taught me how to find a
new way of life, He also gave me the courage to change, He removed fear and
despair from me and gave me hope and love to accept my life
when I trusted in Him He gave me hope for
a better day and a happier way of life I just had to honestly and very humble
ask Him for the guidance to accept His will in my life on His terms, not mine
then let go and let Him show me the way to do it with serenity
Only in today do we have the power to
choose our attitudes and actions over anything this is a freedom it can link us
to our true higher power I had to stop wondering what I could do I had to work
on willingness and open-mindedness about who this higher power
Was going to be in my past willingness
was based on a “What’s in it for me what will I get from this I did not know
willingness comes from humility, a sincere desire to change myself, today I
have faith in my recovery in this Power greater and wiser than myself
Today I am willing to Let Go and Let my
wonderful God do for me what I could not do for myself, when my prayer is from
my heart I know it is a true prayer and am at peace with God acceptance is
trusting everything to God's understanding guidance and care
This does not mean I will be a door mat
for anyone, I do not need to accept unacceptable behaviors from anyone, yet I
can still love them without liking what they are doing to me or to others AA
have taught me that there is good in the worst of us and a bit of bad in the
best of us
God bless you Al M
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