Daily
Reflections reading April 13th
The False Comfort Of Self-Pity
Self-pity
is one of the most unhappy and consuming defects that we know. It is a bar to
all spiritual progress and can cut off all effective communication with our fellows
because of its inordinate demands for attention and sympathy. It is a maudlin
form of martyrdom, which we can ill afford. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 238
The
false comfort of self-pity screens me from reality only momentarily and then
demands, like a drug, that I take an ever bigger dose. If I succumb to this it
could lead to a relapse into drinking. What can I do? One certain antidote is
to turn my attention, however slightly at first, toward others who are
genuinely less fortunate than I, preferably other alcoholics. In the same
degree that I actively demonstrate my empathy with them, I will lessen my own
exaggerated suffering.
© Alcoholics Anonymous World Services
My thoughts on April 13th Reading
Self pity almost got me killed out there, was great at
blaming others for all my problems and all that did for my was get me into a
state of hopelessness, soon everyone was out of my life and I was left alone
with my pitiful self, totally alone in the world except for my precious bottle
I sure thought the world came to an end, no one was there
for me and I had no control over anything my wife hated me, thru me out, the
kids were afraid of me, never know what I was going to be like when I came home
from a drunken night at the men’s club were I thought I was the big shot
Yes I was a very pitiful mess before I found the halls of AA
and thank God I did find these halls, all the hope that was here for me I never
thought I was that bad, till I started to listen to all the shares, BOY how I
could relate to most of them, how I had to control everything and everyone in
my life
Right control as we all know when you need to control
things, you are already out of control when I started to look at the wreckage
of my past again in the fourth step self pity cropped up, I could not believe
the damage I had caused with my attitude towards people, places, and
things
Went into a depression and boy my EGO was completely
deflated, I felt lower than pond scum totally ashamed of myself and did not
think I was deserving of anything anyone had to offer, my sponsor said to my if
anyone waited till they deserved what God has freely given us
None of us would ever sober up, he was right God granted me
this wonderful gift of sobriety, when I turned to Him he forgave me and gave me
a second chance at life on His terms, sure I felt low when I started that
fearful fourth step, but by the time I shared it with my sponsor
Things started to turn around for the better I truly had
that new freedom and happiness they talk about sobriety took the self pity
away, after I got honest with myself with God and with another human being sobriety
gave me back my self respect and taught me how to over come my faults
God has given me the strength to reach out of my self-centered
ways and to become useful to others
What a wonderful way to live I thank God for His gift of
desperation, so I could get His gift of hope, peace, and love, it is a
wonderful gift from God anyone can have just turn over you will to HIM
God bless you Al M
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