Daily Reflections reading
August 2nd
Driven
Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate. ALCOHOLIC ANONYMOUS pg. 62
My selfishness was the driving force behind my drinking. I drank to celebrate success and I drank to drown my sorrows. Humility is the answer. I learn to turn my will and my life over to the care of God. My sponsor tells me that service keeps me sober. Today I ask myself: Have I sought knowledge of God’s will for me? Have I done service for my A. A. group?
© Alcoholics Anonymous World Services
My thoughts on August 6th Reading
Selfishness
and self-centeredness was the root of my problems, it was driven by fear,
self-delusion and pity, I step on everyone to get what I wanted, when I wanted
it and they retaliate. I blamed them for everything and said they hurt me
without any provocation
I know
at some time in the past I was the one to provoke them, as a result I was hurt,
most of my troubles were of my own foolish making, I sure was an extreme
example of self-will run riot, I had to let go of all this selfishness, or it
would have killed
God did
make this possible when I humbly asked Him, I just did not see anyway of
entirely getting rid of self will without His help and guidance, I had moral
convictions but I could not live up to them, I would have liked to but on my
own self-will, it was just wishful thinking I had to have God's help.
First
thing I had to do was quit playing God It didn't work, I could not control the
universe, hell I could not even control my pitiful-self drinking, I learned God
is my Father and I was His child this concept was the keystone of the new arch
I passed thru into step three
Taking
this step I was ready to abandon myself to God, The decision was made now I
needed a course of action, going on to step four a personal house cleaning, my
decision was a vital step but it could have little permanent effect
Unless
followed by an effort to face and to be rid of the things that had been
blocking me, liquor was but a symptom of my disease, I had to get down to
causes and conditions, I had to start a personal inventory, I had to take stock
humbly and honestly
I had to
search out the all the defects in my self-centered make-up, which caused most
of my failure resentment sure was the "number one" offender, it does
destroys more alcoholics than anything else, from resentment and fear, stem all
forms of a spiritual disease
Yes I
had been mentally and physically ill, but also I was very spiritually sick, I
had to find that HP to overcome the spiritual malady and straighten out
mentally and physically, I had to walk thru the action steps of the program,
step four fearless moral inventory
Then step five sharing my inventory with God
myself and another human being, right into steps six I did finally become ready
for God to remove my defects of character, although I was really not entirely
ready to give them all up
I was ready, when I went to step seven, I
thank God for my sponsor who taught me humility, so at this point I could
honestly and humbly asked God to remove my shortcomings, I jumped right into
step eight and made a list of all persons I had harmed
By this time I did became willing to make amends to them all, including myself, Step nine the last of the action steps, I did make amends to people wherever possible and like many of us I could not make amends to some, who I know would be hurt by my amends
Driven by those hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity, are what started me on my journey to a life of sobriety, I pray now they will drive you into the action steps of four thru nine and you find the peace I have found
God bless you Al M
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suggestions or comments
