Daily
Reflections reading December 15th
Doing Anything To Help
Offer
him [the alcoholic] friendship and fellowship. Tell him that if he wants to get
well you will do anything to help. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, P. 95
I remember
how attracted I was to the two men from A.A. who Twelfth-Stepped me. They said
I could have what they had, with no conditions attached, that all I had to do
was make my own decision to join them on the pathway to recovery. When I start
convincing a newcomer to do things my way, I forget how helpful those two men
were to me in their open-minded generosity.
© Alcoholics Anonymous World Services
My thoughts on December 15th Reading
Doing anything to help can become carrying the mess some
times, I needed to learn when to let go
And let God handle things, in His time not mine some just
are not ready yet, or as Dr bob would say they haven't jelled YET
The 12th step is all about carrying the message to the next
suffering alcoholic, even the newest of newcomers, can find many rewards as he
tries to help another, like the one who just walked into the halls, he can put
his hand out to welcome them
I found that by this kind of giving I have found my own
sobriety growing, whether this new person has received anything or not, does
not matter for it kept me sober, I try to only carry the message of recovery,
not the drunk, I just need to be there for them
There is no joy greater than in a Twelfth Step call that is
accepted by the new person, watching their eyes open with wonder, as they move
from the fear and darkness into light, to see their lives fill with purpose and
meaning, to see them received back into family life
To watch people awaken to the presence of a loving God, of
their own understanding, this is what I receive when I try to carry AA 's
message to the alcoholic who still suffers, I sit in AA meetings and listen not
only to get something for me, but also to give my support
I have been told many time in recovery people have the right
not to recover, our best intentions and
Best efforts may not achieve what we want for others,
especially if what we want the most for our family and friends is the recovery
And no matter how much we want them to be healthy and whole
and drug free. Given them all of the information we can give them, show them or
help them, they still have the right not to want this recovery that was freely
given to us
No matter how hard we may try to give, we can't force anyone
else to change, we can't get inside other people's heads and make their choices
for them, decisions that could make a difference do not come from free will
They come from the inside, not the outside, they are
personal not social, the only thing we can do is become example thru how we
live our lives, this is the most powerful tool we have in out tool box for
these situations
The only influence we can make is of a life lived with
serenity and truth, all we can do is let the light of the program shine through
us to them and pray that the wall blocking the light will some how be taken
down so they see the light
As much as I want to give this to people, all I can do is
pray for them to see the light, they are Gods children and He will care for
them until they can care for themselves, I try to remember that my first
problem is to accept their present circumstances as they are
I remember how closed minded I was for so many years in the
grip of this disease, I have to accept all the people around me as they are,
just as I finally accepted my powerlessness, they also have to find and accept
life on life's terms I can only pray for that to come soon
I had to look into my past ways it was hard to walk thru all
the hopelessness and despair, the fear was so great I knew I needed help to do
this, thank God for my sponsors help, my past is a reminder of my old way of
life and will always remind me how much I had to change
And how important it is to freely give all this back to
those who are willing to start over, this is where I will not take any
unacceptable behaviors from anyone family or friends, I will not take any abuse
from anyone today, I have to accept others are not always nice
Some also have the right not to recover from this fatal
disease they have the same choices I had, like
Our son on life support in 2003 and left AMA lasted about 11
months doing it on he own, he went into hospital 2005 bleeding out again and
now needs a liver transplant
He had to have an operation to stop the bleeding in the
veins in his esophagus and he still did not want to go to AA for help, he is
doing it his way again 2 1/2 years sober we just learned when he went to visit
our daughter in Ohio he once again started to drink
This is one of the hardest thing I have ever had to take in
my life, not being able to give it to him, so all we can do is pray for him and
ask that God's will be done for him, God has given many opportunities to help
others to find hope from their disease
Our son continues to drink even today, knowing he is dying
from the use and abuse of alcohol, he is constitutionally incapable of being
honest with himself, I never believed, there were unfortunates who were this
way, until I watched my son doing the same things over and over
Today he is incapable of grasping and developing a manner of
living which demands rigorous honesty there are those who suffer from grave
emotional and mental disorders from the use and abuse of alcohol there chances
are null unless they grasp the meaning of surrender
God bless you Al M
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