Daily Reflections reading October 8th
Daily
Inventory
And
when we were wrong promptly admitted it. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 59
I was beginning to approach my new life of sobriety with unaccustomed enthusiasm. New friends were cropping up and some of my battered friendships had begun to be repaired. Life was exciting, and I even began to enjoy my work, becoming so bold as to issue a report on the lack of proper care for some of our clients. One day a co-worker informed me that my boss was really sore because a complaint, submitted over his head, had caused him much discomfort at the hands of his superiors. I knew that my report had created the problem, and began to feel responsible for my boss’s difficulty. In discussing the affair, my co-worker tried to reassure me that an apology was not necessary, but I soon became convinced that I had to do something, regardless of how it might turn out. When I approached my boss and owned up to my hand in his difficulties, he was surprised. But unexpected things came out of our encounter, and my boss and I were able to agree to interact more directly and effectively in the future.
© Alcoholics Anonymous World Services
My thoughts on October 8th Reading
Taking inventory didn't end with the first nine steps. Step
ten talks about short, quick inventories throughout the day, recovery helps to
detect, whether it is physical mental or spiritual continued personal inventory
is a way to bring matters that could lead to a relapse to the surface
Personal inventory does not stop with the first nine steps
it is an ongoing process throughout the day a quick look is all I needed to
find any negativity I might have building up in me, this spot check helps me to
recognize some defect I might want to talk over with someone like my sponsor
Some times it is as simple as getting to an AA meeting,
using a quick check brings to my conscience things during the day that also
need to be looked at, if I let these feasted in my mind I become very negative
about things and set myself up to drink again
In the beginning, I had to make the time to take this quick
inventory because my thinking in early sobriety tended to be more on the
negative side; over time I could more easily see the negative side of my
thinking because I got into the habit of thinking and not reacting to
situations
This searching for stinking thinking was important to my
staying sober at first I thought this is a pain doing this every day, I was
only looking that elusive easier way out, but I could not very well change old
habits with out doing this daily inventory
I cannot afford to let resentments, guilt, or shame fester
in my pea brain, these can lead to an excuse for a drink, mind you I said
excuse, because the only real reason to pick up another drink is because I
wanted to drink period everything else is an excuse
When drinking I had a real problem with this honesty stuff
these daily inventories help me stay focused with what honesty really is God's
honesty not what I used to think was honest as a human being I will make
mistakes step ten gave me the framework for the continuing self-evaluation of
myself
This inventory could be done any way I felt comfortable
doing it some people sit down and write a bit every night, I tried this at
times, it helps a lot but hard for me to do daily I find it works better for me
first thing in the morning along with planning out my day.
The step suggests this inventory not to be totally negative
I had to use the step to it's fullest, I had to keep track of what was positive
in my life not just the mistakes I make If I find I'm not getting some things
done, I stop long enough to notice what I am getting done.
Often I've set myself up to do too much then I have to look at
what I can skip, or postpone or just give myself credit for all I have done in
my recovery I have to look back and see how far I have come, not looking
forwards to how far I now have to go we seek progress not perfection
The point is I could not to wallow in wrongs I have done,
but I had take an honest look at my actions a complete look meant I had to look
at what’s good about myself, make an honest effort to find and recognize where
I needed to make things right now not let it fest like in my past
I know I am not in charge of any given situation, I have to
look to God for guidance, because I sure do need to take a daily inventory of
my thoughts and actions I have to be sure I acted, not reacted, to people,
places, and things, like I did in my past
I sure needed the time to think, before I open my mouth and
insert my foot like before thinking helps me to do the right thing, I then can
act upon the situation I did the fourth step and have made most of the amends
for my past
Steps 10 -11-12 are
the living steps of our program doing them right will keep us from ever
returning to our past behaviors God gave us the way out and we need to use
every tool He has given us
Please feel free to mail
suggestions or comments
